To love, or to hate?

(written August 9, 2013)

一連多天發了點牢騷,是時候作個總結,然後静下來再多閱讀,多思考。

我在香港出生,對香港有感情(對事物有感情是好事啊!),如果有一天這城市沉淪下去,我也無處可逃。我回想沙士期間,298人死去,百業消條,但香港人是多麼沉着應戰,多麼彼此關心和包容,結果香港沒有死去,反而,近年事無大小只顧爭鬥的社會風氣,卻令我憂心忡忡。大家似乎一下子失去解決矛盾的能力,不懂得agree to disagree, 只求利用羣衆壓力和語言暴力去壓倒對方。

Parker J. Palmer 在To Know as We are Known: Education as a spiritual journey中,強調兩個概念:community,和love。如果教育是一個尋求真理(truth)的過程,這過程必須在community中進行,因為truth不是一件object,由某些人獨自「擁有」;truth是在community中,通過know和be known的不斷探索,而得到的understanding。佛教也很強調衆生的彼此依存(inter-being; inter-connectedness; inter-dependence)。

為什麼要追求truth,Palmer提出這是基於對人類的愛: Knowing is loving。我們都會自認有愛心,但Palmer指出,To control is easy; to love is difficult。這是多麼令人深思! To control是實現我們的primeval instincts,但to love 卻需要我們放下自己的偏見,權力慾,甚或自我,甚至不怕被傷言,To love着實不易啊。

我們可以選擇to love, 或 to hate,作為我們的生存哲學;後者似乎是部份傳媒、政客、網上討論區居民的選擇。我選擇前者(雖然很多時候我都做不到,這是修為不夠),我的原因?因為我只能在這地球上活一次。

追隨 truth, community 和 love,並非表示我們對不公義的事情不作出批評,但是批評的出發點,是要發泄心中的憤怒,表現自我正義感(這是文革時期的我),滿足欺凌天性,希望落井下石,希望同歸於盡?抑或基於愛心,希望共同建設一個更美好社會?如果是後者的話,我們當知除了公審、辱駡,用粗暴的語言外,實有更多更有效的溝通方法。而且,正如聖雄甘地說,我們可以Be the change that you wish to see in the world。

當然,這並不表示我們全部人都要成為革命家,我想起Mother Teresa的名言:“Not all of us can do great things. But we can do small things with great love.”

有一段聖經我佷喜歡,它說到空洞的批評,其實是多麼的徒勞;及說到愛的本質:

If I have all the eloquence of men or of angels, but speak without love, I am simply a gong booming or a cymbal clashing. If I have the gift of prophecy, understanding all the mysteries there are, and knowing everything, and if I have faith in all its fullness, to move mountains, but without love, then I am nothing at all. ….

Love is always patient and kind; it is never jealous; love is never boastful or conceited; it is never rude or selfish; it does not take offense, and is not resentful. Love takes no pleasure in other people’s sins but delights in the truth; it is always ready to excuse, to trust, to hope, and to endure whatever comes. (1 Corinthians 13)

這,才是我們應走的道路。

 

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